516 Youth

Youth News

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 11:28:34 -0500

“Move Up” Sunday

On Sunday, June 17, students entering 6th or 9th grade in the fall will move up and start attending the Jr. & Sr. High Sunday school classes respectively. The rising 6th graders can also start coming to youth group that night.

Youth Snack Volunteers

If you are the parent of one of the rising 6th graders who will be joining youth group on June 17th, please consider signing up to contribute snacks on a rotating basis. Current volunteers are responsible for bringing snacks and drinks once every 6-8 weeks. You’ll receive a schedule for a few months at a time and a reminder from the church when your week comes up. Let me know if you are able to help.

Graduating Seniors

If you know of any students who attend CBC and are graduating high school this spring, please let me know who they are.

Who Do You Worship?

Tue, 27 Mar 2012 11:22:00 -0500

In Sr. High Sunday School, we are going through the book Vintage Jesus by Mark Driscoll and Gerry Breshears. This week’s topic was Why Should We Worship Jesus?, and part of the lesson dealt with what worship is and what it is not, including the issue of idolatry. Driscoll and Breshears write,

The opposite of worship is idolatry, or the worshiping of something or someone other than the One True God of the Bible alone. On this point, Christian philosopher Peter Kreeft has said, “The alternative to theism is not atheism but idolatry.”

The Apostle Paul touches on this in the first chapter of his epistle to the Romans, where he writes:

21 For although they knew God, they did not honor him as God or give thanks to him, but they became futile in their thinking, and their foolish hearts were darkened. 22 Claiming to be wise, they became fools, 23 and exchanged the glory of the immortal God for images resembling mortal man and birds and animals and creeping things.

Dealing with this idea of worshipping created things rather than the Creator, Driscoll notes an experience he had in India, when after seeing various temples and personal shrines erected to false gods, an Indian believer commented on the idolatry prevalent in the United States. Although Driscoll was at first taken aback by such a comment, upon further reflection, he realized it was true.

We picked up on this theme of idol worship in America at youth group on Sunday night by watching the following video that is played before each LSU home football game:

Did you catch the religious imagery there? Tiger Stadium is referred to as a “pantheon of stone.” (The word ‘pantheon’ refers to a people’s collection of gods and comes from the Pantheon, which was a Roman temple dedicated as the house of the gods.) The narrator declares “It is the cathedral of college football, and worship happens here,” as video shows fans bowing before the players. Toward the end, the stadium is declared “sacred ground,” using a word associated with holiness and the presence of God. It is an incredibly well-produced video that does its job of firing up the home crowd, but it is also steeped in idolatrous language that many either overlook or choose to ignore, which emphasizes the point made in this video done by The Skit Guys:

I think The Skit Guys are correct in assuming that many of us think of idol worship as something like the golden calf (or the temples and shrines that Mark Driscoll saw in India) when in fact much of our own behavior may be idolatrous. In fact, Driscoll and Breshears include the following questions to help us identify our idols:

Who or what do I make sacrifices for?
Who or what is most important to me?
If I could have any thing or experience I wanted, what would that be?
Who or what makes me the most happy?
What is the one person or thing I could not live without?
What do I spend my money on?
Who or what do I devote my spare time to?

For many in Baton Rouge, LSU football can be an idol. For my family, the New York Giants often serve that role. But it doesn’t have to be a football team, or even sports. It can be the computer, video games, social networking or other technological toys. It can be food, drink, lusts, sex, or other physical pleasures. Or it can be dreams of the future and obsessions over relationships, marriage, family, college, or career aspirations. Anything that takes the place of God in our life is an idol. In youth group, students were encouraged to consider those questions and identify the idols in their lives, and I encourage parents to continue to help them identify not only their idols but the idols the family as a whole might be bowing before.

Because the scary thing is that idolatry can have a very real impact on our lives. In Romans 1, immediately after describing how people exchanged the glory of God for the image of created things, Paul writes,

24 Therefore God gave them up in the lusts of their hearts to impurity, to the dishonoring of their bodies among themselves, 25 because they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator, who is blessed forever! Amen.

26 For this reason God gave them up to dishonorable passions. For their women exchanged natural relations for those that are contrary to nature; 27 and the men likewise gave up natural relations with women and were consumed with passion for one another, men committing shameless acts with men and receiving in themselves the due penalty for their error.

28 And since they did not see fit to acknowledge God, God gave them up to a debased mind to do what ought not to be done. 29 They were filled with all manner of unrighteousness, evil, covetousness, malice. They are full of envy, murder, strife, deceit, maliciousness. They are gossips, 30 slanderers, haters of God, insolent, haughty, boastful, inventors of evil, disobedient to parents, 31 foolish, faithless, heartless, ruthless. 32 Though they know God’s righteous decree that those who practice such things deserve to die, they not only do them but give approval to those who practice them.

Paul lists all kinds of sins, from homosexuality to murder to disobeying one’s parents, but he says that at the root of all of them is the fact that “they exchanged the truth about God for a lie and worshiped and served the creature rather than the Creator.” When we lose sight of who God is and elevate something else into the place he should have in our lives, we fall into all kinds of sins. As Driscoll and Breshears put it in Vintage Jesus:

According to the first two commandments, there is only one God, and that God alone is to be worshiped. Martin Luther said that we break the rest of the commandments only after we have broken the first two. What he means is that if the One True God is my only God, and I worship only that God, then I will not end up committing idolatry by worshiping my job (and not taking a Sabbath), worshiping my anger (and becoming violent), worshiping sex (and committing adultery), worshiping things (and stealing them), or worshiping success (and coveting what other people have). … At the root of all sin is the confusion, or inversion, of creator and creation.

So it’s important for us to ask ourselves who we are worshipping and if we have allowed something or someone to take God’s rightful place in our lives. It is also important for us to always remember (but especially when we stumble into idolatrous patterns) that

The only hope for… every… sinner prone to break the first two commandments is to believe the truth that only when God is glorified will we be truly satisfied. Through the worship of Jesus Christ alone there is joy, freedom, holiness, and life. Only by worshiping God our Creator are we free to enjoy creation by rightly eating, drinking, sleeping, playing, working, laughing, loving, weeping, marrying, parenting, living, and dying to the glory of God.
— Vintage Jesus

A Resolution Worth Keeping

Fri, 10 Feb 2012 09:28:09 -0600

A Resolution Worth Keeping:

The school I taught at in NJ recently asked me to write a short New Year’s-themed devotional for their school newspaper. I wrote about the difference between making resolutions and living like Paul, according to Philippians 3. Since it was geared toward Jr. & Sr. Highers, I thought I’d share it here as well.

Photo

Wed, 25 Jan 2012 22:50:21 -0600

James 5:16 January 22, 2012 click the image to download a pdf...

Sun, 22 Jan 2012 21:00:00 -0600

James 5:16

January 22, 2012

click the image to download a pdf copy of the slides

Our 3:16 Foundation January 15, 2012 click the image to download...

Sun, 15 Jan 2012 21:00:00 -0600

Our 3:16 Foundation

January 15, 2012

click the image to download a pdf of the slides

The Beauty of Grace (Matthew 20:1-16) January 8, 2012 click the...

Sun, 08 Jan 2012 21:00:00 -0600

The Beauty of Grace (Matthew 20:1-16)

January 8, 2012

click the image to download a pdf of the slides

Youth News

Thu, 29 Dec 2011 11:47:00 -0600

Next Youth Group is Sunday, January 8

There will be no youth group this week due to the continued holiday break. Also, based on the responses to the survey about possibly moving youth group to mid-week, we will keeping it on Sunday nights. This means that our next meeting will be Sunday, January 8. A new snack list for January-April will also be distributed soon.

New Sunday School Class Starting January 15

The Jr. & Sr. High Sunday school classes will be cancelled on January 8 so that students can attend the pancake breakfast and informational session for our children’s ministry.

On Sunday, January 15, we will be starting a new series in the High School class based loosely on the book Vintage Jesus: Timely Answers to Timeless Questions by Mark Driscoll and Gerry Breshears. We will not be reading the book together (although you are of course welcome to pick it up and read it on your own!), but we will be using the chapters as the outline for the class. The chapter titles are:

Is Jesus the Only God?
How Human Was Jesus?
How Did People Know Jesus Was Coming?
Why Did Jesus Come to Earth?
Why Did Jesus’ Mom Need to Be a Virgin?
What Did Jesus Accomplish on the Cross?
Did Jesus Rise from Death?
Where is Jesus Today?
Why Should We Worship Jesus?
What Makes Jesus Superior to Other Saviors?
What Difference Has Jesus Made in History?
What Will Jesus Do upon His Return?

College students and young adults are again welcome to join us as we study the person and work of Jesus Christ.

The Purpose-Driven Facebook

Tue, 13 Dec 2011 16:31:00 -0600

The Purpose-Driven Facebook:

This is another post for my personal blog and something I’ve been brooding about for a while now. I encourage all Christian young people who have a Facebook account (or want one) to read it and to examine what they post and why they post it. It would probably be good for parents to read it as well in order to hold them accountable.

Is Student-Athlete Becoming an Oxymoron?

Mon, 12 Dec 2011 14:19:01 -0600

Is Student-Athlete Becoming an Oxymoron?:

This is a post I wrote on my personal blog about the emphasis that we place on sports, especially at the high school and college level. I used to have frequent conversations on this topic with several people in NJ, and the brawl at the end of the Cincinnati-Xavier college basketball game on Saturday served as the impetus for me to put some of my thoughts in writing. I decided to post a link to it here in case the topic interested anyone.

Forming Intergenerational Connections, Part 3

Sat, 10 Dec 2011 12:51:00 -0600

This is part 3 of a 3-part series on helping the younger and older generations form relationships within the church. For why these relationships are needed and who they should be formed with, read Part 1 and Part 2 of the series.

Forming new relationships can be intimidating, especially for those of us who aren’t very outgoing (I, for one, am extremely introverted). There is always a risk of rejection (or just plain awkwardness) when you put yourself out there. But hopefully these tips for forming relationships between teens/young adults and those who are middle-aged or AARP members will be simple enough to avoid some of that awkwardness. For those of you who are outgoing and have no problem just walking up to someone and starting a relationship, feel free to jump right in and let us know how it goes.

1. Start Small

Send a card for birthdays, graduations, and other important events. Include a personal message of encouragement or congratulations and maybe your favorite Bible verse. Everyone likes to get a personal greeting on those big events and milestones in life.
Friend them on Facebook. If you are someone who has ventured into the world of social networking, Facebook can be a great way to build a connection with a young person. Write comments of encouragement and congratulations when they post statuses expressing the highs and lows of life. Let them know you are praying for them. Facebook provides an informal way to initiate a relationship.
Talk to them at church. Think of something they contribute to the church (it could be a song during the service or helping with nursery or even just being a friendly face) and let them know that you notice and appreciate their contribution. Young people want to know that they are valuable to the church.

2. Grow Gradually

Although you may stay small with the majority of young people in church, there should be a small group that you start feeling comfortable enough with to start to grow your relationship. Some of these relationships may be with your own children and grandchildren as they start to grow into adulthood, but it should not be limited to them. As both parties start to be more familiar with each other, you may want to do some of the following:

Take them out for coffee or lunch. Almost every teenager and college student I know likes coffee (or at least those mostly-cream-and-sugar-with-a-little-bit-of-coffee-added-for-flavoring drinks that they get at Starbucks). Coffee shops provide an informal setting with enough privacy to have a real conversation. Diners are good for this too, and what young person doesn’t like getting a free meal?
Call them up and pray for them. Know they have a big exam, athletic event, or performance coming up? Do more than just say you’re praying for them. Call them up the day before and pray for them and with them. Let them know they are important enough for you to take the time and effort to make them a priority.
Attend their extracurricular events. Who wouldn’t want their own personal cheering section? I did high jump for my high school track team. My brother and a few friends that came to youth group with us were on the team too. Track meets aren’t exactly thrilling to watch, and even though we were good, many parents didn’t show up to every single meet. The fact that our youth pastor would come to meets and video tape us so we could analyze our form afterwards was a huge deal for us.
Use your skills to help enhance theirs. If you play an instrument and know that a young person is interested in music, invite them to help in your ministry or group and use that as a way to tutor their skill and shepherd their heart. If you love to read and write and know that a young person is an aspiring writer, offer to read their work and offer tips on how to get better (but be encouraging!). Use the skills and interests you already have to build relationships with young people who have similar ones.

3. Think Big

Look for ways to make a big impact in the life of a young person. Figure out what their interests are, and pray about how you can really get involved in those areas. Here are some of the ways older adults did this for me:

Supporting my missions trips. I started taking trips to Russia when I was in high school, and the people who were the most supportive were the older people in church. Some of them just frequently reminded me they were praying for me and were genuinely interested in hearing about the trips when I came home. Others supported me financially, including one person who supplied almost half of my support for the year-long internship I did.
Giving me books. One older couple in the church realized that as they aged, they should do more with their library than just have it sit and collect dust. So they decided to donate the books to various libraries and groups. But before they did, they separated out a bunch of books they thought I would use and enjoy and gave them to me. Not only did I appreciate the free books to augment my own collection, the fact that this couple knew enough about me and decided to bless me in this way meant a lot.
Loving my wife and son. Olya doesn’t have any family. She was literally orphaned as a teenager. So when she came over from Russia, it was a great blessing to us that the older people in church adopted her and became surrogate grandparents to us. The same thing happened when our son was born. He always had people doting on him and playing with him. When you love the people I love, you earn a special place in my heart. Ask yourself who in church needs someone older to come along and serve as their surrogate parent or grandparent. That’s someone you need to be loving on.

These people are still near and dear to my heart. They attended my wedding. They are on my Christmas card list. They made a huge impact in my life. For whom can you do the same? What gifts, resources, talents, or abilities do you have that can be used to meet the needs of someone younger in the church? What needs do you have that a young person can meet for you? The answer to those questions will show you how you can start and build relationships.

Join me in praying that these relationships will be formed at our church, and encourage each other as you start to initiate them.

Set an Example in Purity (1 Timothy 4:12) December 4,...

Tue, 06 Dec 2011 10:20:00 -0600

Set an Example in Purity (1 Timothy 4:12)

December 4, 2011

click the image to download a pdf of the slides

the video we showed at youth group last night … a powerful...

Mon, 05 Dec 2011 09:09:55 -0600

the video we showed at youth group last night … a powerful presentation by Folk Angel reminding us of what Christmas is really about

Youth News

Fri, 02 Dec 2011 10:58:00 -0600

Youth Christmas Party

Our youth group Christmas party will be next Sunday, December 11th, at the Fosters’ house during our regular youth group time (6:00-7:30). We’ll play some games and have dessert together. Each student should bring a $5 grab-bag-type gift.

Setting an example in purity…

At youth group this Sunday, we’ll conclude our series on 1 Timothy 4:12 as we talk about setting an example in purity. The word for “purity” has 2 main meanings, to be morally blameless or clean (more general) and to be chaste (more specific). Because of how young most of our youth group is, I’ll be sticking mainly to the more general meaning of being morally blameless or clean. I encourage parents, however, to take the opportunity provided by this verse in 1 Timothy as well as Pastor Steve’s messages on marriage (last week) and singleness (this week) to have conversations with your children about sex and sexual purity. The average American male sees pornography for the first time at age 12, usually on the internet or through a friend. If your child goes online or watches TV and movies, chances are they are exposed to some level of sexuality or sexual themes. It’s important that their view on this subject be molded by parents rather than media or friends. If you’ve already had the “birds and bees” talk with them, this might be a good time to revisit the issue and ask if they have any questions since your last talk or to extend the issue to the importance of purity (especially if they’ve hit puberty since you last talked and hormones are starting to kick in). If you haven’t had “the talk” with them yet, this might be a good time to address that.

Forming Intergenerational Connections, Part 2

Sun, 27 Nov 2011 23:52:00 -0600

In my previous post, I detailed why it is important for young people to form relationships with older believers in the church. Today I want to briefly describe who they should form relationships with. Because of the subject matter, instead of addressing parents, I’d like to directly address those who will be used by God to speak into the lives of our youth.

I suspect that one of the reasons why older people fail to mentor or shepherd the younger generation is because they feel like they don’t have much to offer or that the younger generation wouldn’t be interested in what they have to offer. While this is an understandable fear, the fact remains that whether the older generation wants to mentor the younger one or not, today’s young people need to be mentored (reread part 1 of this series if you need a reminder why). And it doesn’t need to be done by some super saint, corporate CEO, or athletic superstar. It just needs to be done, by anyone who is willing.

I like how Tony Dungy, the former head coach of the Indianapolis Colts and Super Bowl XLI champion, put it in his book The Mentor Leader: Secrets to Building People and Teams that Win Consistently:

We need strong men to build into the lives of our younger men and boys. Not extraordinary people; just ordinary, everyday men who care enough to invest themselves—their time, attention, and wisdom—in the lives of others, whether as a part of their natural leadership environment or as an additional relationship they purposefully undertake. …

The need is clear and urgent for men who … care enough to pass along what it means to truly be a man. …

We need more women as well to step up as role models for young girls, women who will spend time with girls, affirming them and building into their lives what it means to be a woman of value, significance, and values.

I would also add that it’s important for young men to have godly grandmothers in the church and for young women to have godly grandfathers. Those opposite sex relationships need to be more closely guarded, but they should still occur within the confines of group church events. But still, Dungy’s point that we simply need older people to invest in our youth is accurate.

It’s a cliche, but it really is true that your ability matters less than your availability. Kids, teens, and young adults just need genuine people who care about them speaking into their lives. It doesn’t have to just be people who are trained leaders or mentors.

But obviously “being human” isn’t really the only qualification for someone you want having an influence on today’s youth. So what other characteristics should you have? What type of person do you need to be to have that positive Godly influence on a young person? I’ll make it simple with a short acronym: ABC. You simply need to be someone who is:

Available to
Build
Character

I’ll quickly unpack what I mean by each of these.

Available

This might be somewhat self-explanatory, especially in light of what was said above. But just to reiterate, basically, you need to be willing to devote the time and effort needed to connect with a young person. It doesn’t have to be a ton of time (it could just be getting a cup of coffee every so often) or a lot of effort (even a kind word and brief conversation when you see someone at church on Sundays could have an impact), but you do need to have the desire to take those steps. Ultimately you can’t be forced to do this. But if you surrender to God, tell him, “Lord, use me in the life of this young person,” and make the effort to build a relationship, I’m confident that God will honor and bless that.

to Build

Elsewhere in The Mentor Leader, Dungy states that

Mentor leadership focuses on building people up, building significance into their lives, and building leaders for the next generation.

Hopefully there will be a foundation for you to build on, like there was for Paul with Timothy whose mother and grandmother had given him the basics of the faith. Ideally you’ll just be building on what parents and the Church have already laid and are continuing to lay. (As a side note, it’s important to remember that you are just building on; you aren’t to take the place of the parent in this kind of situation or contradict them or their decisions.) In a less than perfect situation, you might have to be the one to lay the foundation. But the point is that young people constantly have people tearing them down: peers who make fun of them when they fail, media that constantly reminds them of their faults, an inner voice that fears they will never be good enough, or a sense of pride that builds them up with false things, but actually succeeds only in tearing them down. The ultimate goal of a mentoring relationship should be to help the teen or young adult increase “in wisdom and in stature and in favor with God and man.” (Luke 2:52)

Character

According to Dungy,

At its core, mentoring is about building character into the lives of others, modeling and teaching attitudes and behaviors, and creating a constructive legacy to be passed along to future generations of leaders.

To build character in someone else, you must be a person of character yourself. Ultimately, all Christians should be striving to be like Jesus (1 John 2:6) and to meet the qualifications placed on church leaders (1 Timothy 3:1-13; Titus 1:5-9; 1 Peter 5:1-5). There are also general characteristics that should be true of all of us, like Paul’s description of love (1 Corinthians 13:4-8a) and the fruit of the spirit (Galatians 5:22-23).

But specifically as it regards building up the younger generation, Paul says the following in Titus 2:2-5 about the character of older believers who have an influence on younger ones:

2 Older men are to be sober-minded, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in steadfastness. 3 Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, 4 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

Basically, older believers are to be role-models in thought, action, and speech. Young people (whether believers or unbelievers) should be able to tell how they should speak and act from watching and listening to you. It’s intimidating when you think about it, but it’s also not anything we are not already called to.

One additional thing I want to add to this character issue is the idea of accountability. It’s something that Dungy also equates with character, saying

Being accountable is one of the most important things a leader can do. To me, it’s closely aligned with character. It’s hard to have true character if you can’t be accountable.

But it’s also something that we’ve been reminded of recently in college sports news with Jerry Sandusky at Penn State and Bernie Fine at Syracuse. We are called to be above reproach (1 Timothy 3:2; Titus 1:6), and that is especially important as it applies to children. I won’t belabor the point as I’ve already written about the importance of character and accountability as it relates to the Penn State situation, but it is important to review those principles of accountability to ensure that your mentoring relationship doesn’t turn into something that compromises the youth’s safety or your reputation.

As with any new relationship, this can seem intimidating and overwhelming, but it is really just fulfilling the role that we are already called to. Those “older men” and “older women” in the Titus 2 passage weren’t a group of super saints or youth workers. They were just the regular people in Titus’ church. All of us are called to help bring up our teens and young adults in the faith. And really, if you were blessed with children yourself, it’s probably something you wish someone had done or would do for your kids. In part 3, I’ll hopefully make it even less intimidating for you by offering some suggestions as to how to go about initiating those relationships.

Set an Example in Faith (1 Timothy 4:12) November 20,...

Tue, 22 Nov 2011 11:02:00 -0600

Set an Example in Faith (1 Timothy 4:12)

November 20, 2011

click the image to download a pdf of the slides

Youth News

Mon, 21 Nov 2011 08:00:00 -0600

Youth Game Time

For any youth-group-aged kids (6th-12th grade) who have off from school today, we’ll be hanging out at the church from 1:00-4:00 pm. I’ll have the Wii, ping-pong table, and air hockey table set up, and we might do some games outside too. There’s no need to bring anything (except maybe Wii remotes if you have them), but if you would want drinks or snacks during that time, you should plan on bringing them with you.

No Youth Group Next Week

There will be no youth group next Sunday, November 27th due to it being Thanksgiving weekend. We’ll pick back up on Sunday, December 4th.

Flag Football

Don’t forget that this Friday we’ll be having a Flag Football game followed up by pizza and the LSU-Arkansas game. The flag football game will start at 11:30 so arrive before then to warm up and so we can form teams. This isn’t limited to just youth so all ages are welcome to come out, even if you just want to cheer us (and LSU) on instead of playing.

Forming Intergenerational Connections, Part 1

Tue, 15 Nov 2011 20:09:00 -0600

Earlier today I posted a link to an article in Leadership Journal on how intergenerational connections help young people develop a faith that endures the transition from living at home to going to college or entering the workforce. Because this is something I would love to see characterize our church, I thought it might be helpful for me to elaborate on the subject. So over the next few days, I’m going to write up a 3-part series looking at why we should help our children build these connections, who we should help them connect with, and finally, how we go about initiating those connections.

I know how important connecting with other generations can be because I benefited from those types of relationships when I was a teenager and young adult. I love my parents, and I had (and still have) a good relationship with them, but as important as that relationship was in terms of helping me come to and mature in my faith, my relationships with other adults were also a vital part of that process.

Adults that influenced my life (both spiritually and otherwise) ranged from the youth pastor (just a few years older than I was) who poured his life into those of us in youth group to the senior citizens group that seemed to adopt me as a surrogate grandson, praying for me, supporting my missions trips, and becoming teary-eyed when I left New Jersey to move to Louisiana. (In fact, the seniors invited me to speak at their monthly meeting while I was still in college, giving me one of my first experiences in intergenerational ministry.) Relationships with those closer to my parents’ age also were important in my development, whether it was the pastors at church or those with whom I served in various ministries.

I think you see something similar in Scripture with Paul and Timothy. The foundation of Timothy’s faith was laid at home, apparently by his mother and grandmother (2 Timothy 1:5), but the relationship and ministry experience that he shared with Paul were what developed him into a pastor and leader. Paul became a spiritual father to Timothy, to the point that he refers to him as his “child” (1 Timothy 1:2, 18; 2 Timothy 1:2, 2:1). 1 and 2 Timothy are essentially Paul continuing to speak into Timothy’s life and ministry through the means of epistles.

So what makes these intergenerational relationships so valuable? Why should we help our children form them?

1. Intergenerational connections are part of a biblical model of discipleship. If you read the New Testament, you aren’t going to find a whole lot of examples of “youth groups.” In fact, you aren’t going to find any. That’s not to say that youth ministry is unbiblical. Like the Leadership Journal article, I think there is benefit to separating out teenagers at times for age-specific instruction, fellowship, etc. However, the New Testament (and specifically Titus 2) tells the older men to model godly behavior for the younger men and the older women to instruct the younger women. The inference is that as Christians were living life together (working, ministering, worshiping) the older generation would have enough of a relationship with the younger generation that they could model and instruct them on what a godly life is to look like. We also have the examples of older men training younger men in Paul and Timothy or Barnabas and John Mark in Scripture or the disciples and their disciples in early church history. The Bible leaves room for youth ministries to be created. What it doesn’t leave room for is the creation of a youth sub-culture and sub-church that operates separately from the larger church body. The church is to be a unified whole, which necessitates intergenerational connections being formed.

2. Today’s young people want intergenerational connections. In their book, The Millennials: Connecting to America’s Largest Generation (the Millennial generation includes those born in between 1980 and 2000), Thom & Jess Rainer report that according to their study, [emphasis is mine]

“Three out of four Millennials would like a leader to come beside them and teach them leadership skills. [They] value a leader who is willing to take his or her time to teach skills that otherwise may not be learned. … They are looking for true mentors in the workplace. They don’t want merely disseminators of knowledge in educational institutions; they want men and women who are examples through their lives as well as their words. They will avoid institutions that treat them like one of the masses; but they will flock to institutions that have transparent and servantlike leaders. “

The study also found that today’s young people value the advice and input of their parents (89% receive advice from their parents, and 77% seek out their parents’ advice on a regular basis), and that that respect for their parents carries over to other older people (94% said they have great respect for older generations). Whether they will admit it to you or not, chances are that your teenaged or young-adult children desire adult role models and mentors that will help them navigate the upcoming transitions in their lives.

3. Intergenerational connections reinforce and build upon what the parents have taught at home. I’ve encountered many parents that are hesitant to allow other adults to speak into their child’s life. Sometimes it’s based in insecurity, with the parents acting out of fear that another adult will replace them as the primary influence in the child’s life. I’ve also seen parents who feel insulted when their child ignored their advice 100 times and then listened to it when it came from someone else. I don’t want to diminish those feelings because I can understand them, but if we remember back to when we were teenagers, I’m sure we all did the same things to our own parents.

The important thing to realize is that it’s not all that important if they heed godly advice coming from you or from someone else, as long as they heed it. Teenagers and young adults have bad advice coming from all angles from their peers. The more positive influences and role models they have giving them sound, godly advice, the better. Their friends will give them advice whether they ask for it or not, especially on topics they would be uncomfortable talking about with a parent. If your child has another adult they feel comfortable talking to and listening to, there’s a greater chance that they will make wise decisions. Even as a teenager I would go to my youth pastor and other pastors and role models for advice. It’s a credit to my parents that they trusted those people enough to let me do so.

On the other hand, this point assumes that there is something from home on which to build, that parents are laying the foundation like Lois and Eunice did for Timothy. However, the alternate extreme to the parents who don’t want additional adult influences for their kids are parents who take advantage of the other adult influences to abdicate their parental responsibility. As the Leadership Journal article described, parents being involved in the teen’s life is also vitally important. Intergenerational connections supplement good parenting; they don’t replace it.

4. Intergenerational connections give young people the opportunity to see faith lived out in a variety of circumstances and life-stages. Teens need to see what it looks like to successfully navigate college and prepare for a career. College students need to see what it’s like to hold down a job, prepare for marriage and start a family. Young couples and parents need to see what godly marriages and parenting look like. Everybody needs to see what it looks like to age gracefully and finish life well. The only way to truly get a glimpse into what future life-stages should and do look like is to share life with those currently going through them. Having positive influences scattered across various life-stages gives young people something to aim for and to emulate and helps balance out the negative examples they’ll see in the world and media.

5. It bridges the cultural divide. Have you ever been in a church (or even a family) where the older generation and younger generation just don’t get along? The people bicker about everything from clothing styles to music preferences to sermon length and content. The church ends up declining in numbers and energy. It’s depressing. And since the older generations are the ones with the money and track record, it’s often the young people who miss out on being part of that church. In some churches, the conflict never actually breaks out, but there is an underlying understanding that the young just need to fall in line. And of course the idea that the older generation is out to get them has been a key feature in youth culture since youth culture has been around (which, as a side note, is not that long).

This intergenerational conflict comes naturally. We don’t have to work at it. We do, however, need to work in order to avoid (or resolve) this conflict, and the key to doing so is understanding one another. And the only way for different generations to understand each other is to live life together and share experiences. Getting to know one other (and I mean, really getting to know one another, not just being acquainted enough to nod and say, “How y’all doing today?” as you pass each other) helps each person know where the other is coming from, gives each an appreciation for the other’s viewpoint (as well as an opportunity to communicate their own), and prevents the petty complaints that naturally arise from unfamiliarity.

6. It helps young people feel connected and involved in the church. Young people in general, but particularly this current generation, desire to be in a place where they feel connected to people. If our teens graduate high school without feeling like they belong at Community Bible Church, they will not continue to come when it is up to them to decide. Just bringing your child to church every Sunday is not enough to ensure that they come on their own later in life. Intentional steps need to be taken to ensure that church is a place where they feel comfortable, connected, and, above all, valued. Young people need to feel like they can contribute to the church, that their contribution means something, and that their continued contribution is valued. I’ll address this topic some more in part 3, but these intergenerational relationships are a way to help them feel connected. According to The Millennials,

The best connectors in religious institutions are relationships. The best way to get a Millennial involved in a service, activity, or ministry is through relationships. … If an employer, service organization, religious body, or any other group wants to get the best out of members of this generation, they can’t overlook their strong desire to stay connected with others.

Other benefits to these relationships are the infusion of youthful energy into the church, the reminder for the older generations of what it was like to be young (and either without God or newly in love with him), and a lessened workload for those busy with jobs and families as the young people take on responsibility for the church’s mission. Ensuring that our teens and young adults build relationships across the various generations in the church shouldn’t be seen as an additional burden. Instead view it as an integral part of fulfilling our mission to “be a community of Christ and reach our community for Christ.” In part 2, we’ll look at what type of people you should target in helping teens form those relationships.

Faith that Sticks

Tue, 15 Nov 2011 13:16:00 -0600

Faith that Sticks:

Intergenerational connections and parental involvement give kids a faith that lasts beyond high school.

I’m afraid that in our effort to offer relevant and age-appropriate teaching and fellowship for teenagers, we have segregated students from the rest of the church. According to our research, that segregation is causing students to shelve their faith. But there’s also good news. Getting rid of the two-table system, and placing teens in intergenerational contexts of worship, ministry, and life, helps their faith thrive—in high school and beyond.

Set an Example in Love (1 Timothy 4:12) November 13, 2011 click...

Sun, 13 Nov 2011 20:57:50 -0600

Set an Example in Love (1 Timothy 4:12)

November 13, 2011

click the image to download a pdf of the slides